While Grace meets with her therapist I meet with a counselor (not sure if she is a behavioralist or family counselor). We watch her through a 1 way mirror and talk about whats going on, suggestions, etc. On Monday she said to me, " Within 2 years Grace will grow out of her diagnosis." I want to make a couple statements you may or may not agree with, but just bear with me and hear me out. 1. I do NOT believe autism is a diagnosis you grow out of. Nor do I believe any diagnosis is one you grow out of (ie depression, bi-polar, diabetes, etc). 2. I do NOT believe it is wrong to label your kid.
Now that I have probably offended half the people reading this, I would like to explain myself. When someone gets a diagnosis, we are all so quick to "fix it". To make it sound better. So we tell ourselves things like, oh it will go away; or they will outgrow it. I do not believe a child with autism will outgrow it. I do however, believe with all my heart, they will learn to manage it. I absolutely believe my daughter will go to a regular school and as she gets older, no one would ever guess she is labeled autistic. That doesnt mean, if something changes she isnt expecting she will handle it like any other kid. That doesnt mean if she doesnt get enough sensory input she will jsut deal with it. It means, that she will learn to manage it. She will learn coping skills that will allow her to adjust. We may not have to carry chewy tubes, but she will probably carry gum. We wont have to carry fidgets, but she will doodle. We may not have to brush her, but she may have a way to get deep pressure massage at home. This still means, if you surprise her she may not like it. She may not be super outgoing (or maybe she will be!), she may not like to be touched certain ways, and certain things may always upset her. She will grow up to be the person God has intended her to be. Autism or not, she is not defined by it, but it IS a label!
Now to the part I am sure I have offended everybody with! We often avoid seeking help for our kids for fear of the dreaded label. Whether we label a child or not, they are labeled. You are labeled and I am labeled. There are labels that are very hurtful and wrong, I am certainly not going to argue that. No child should ever be called retarded, crippled, strange, ugly, fat, or many other hurtful words. When you hear label, those are likely the words that come to your mind. I think its to easy to forget, there are other labels out there too. Beautiful, sweet, smart, kind, honest, helpful, outgoing. I can make the list of good labels much easier than the list of bad. For so long we have been afraid to allow any sort of label to be put on people. We are the ones who have made a label a bad thing. I think we could be the ones to make it a good thing! I am not afraid for my child to be labeled autistic. Along with that label, comes smart, beautiful, mischevious, frustrated, and many other labels. I dont see any of them as bad. Just like our words can be hurtful, labels can be used to hurt people as well. I think, just as we teach our children NOT to use the hurtful words, we could also teach people NOT to use the hurtful labels.
Just some thoughts that have been rolling in my head. I dont in any way want to offend anyone with it, I just wanted to share how I felt.
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